Confessions of a first time parent

I was absolutely the BEST parent…before I had kids.

I was that girl that would look at other mothers and fathers and make judgments about how they parent their children.

I would think to myself…”when I’m a mother…”

Man, was I wrong – on all counts.

Some things about parenthood I never knew or thought I knew then was quickly corrected

1. If you say you’ll never do something – you’ll probably end up doing it. This is disgusting. Izzy has an unhealthy addiction to her Binky. Before her, I didn’t want my child to use a pacifier. If she needed to be soothed, I could do it…there was NO way I was going to cut corners and stick a paci in my baby’s mouth. HA! Now – it’s a lifesaver to stop her from wailing. The other day – I dropped it on the floor in my kitchen – she was wailing as usual – and instead of really washing it – I dunked it in my glass of water and stuck it back in her mouth. Gross….

2. Breastfeeding was really, really, really difficult for me at first. I wanted to start formula pretty much after her little gums clamped on my ‘reola. But, I stuck it out because it was best for her. I was pretty private about breastfeeding in the hospital and would have everyone leave the room when it was time to nurse. Now – 5 weeks into this motherhood thing – if you’re in the room and it’s time for Izzy to eat – be ready to see the ladies – large and in charge.

3. I couldn’t believe it when mother’s who stayed at home would let their houses go to the crapper. I KNEW when I was a mom and stayed at home – my house would be spic and span. I would think – “they have all this time! Their baby just sleeps all day – all they need to do is clean while their little one sleeps…they must be lazy.” These days – my tile floors now have a layer of dog hair and dirt that I am starting to grow fond of, my stovetop has become best friends with the grease layer that sits on it, and I’ve let my dogs be my vacuum for crumbs that “accidentally” end up on the floor. I realized pretty much after day one that the key to a mother’s happiness is napping with their baby and all that matters is a happy mom and not a clean house.

4. Getting “ready” to leave the house takes at least 45 minutes longer than it used to. Babies have a lot of accessories, you can’t time when they’ll have a dirty diaper, spit up all over themselves and need a costume change – and then the whole process of mom getting ready – that’s a whole other issue. I finally get it why some mom’s are always 20 minutes behind…it’s just how it is.

5. Crying, screaming babies don’t care where they are. I used to look at mom’s who’s kids would fuss – GASP! – in public and think “they just aren’t in tune with their child’s needs…” Yeah right! I look at my little one when she’s throwing a fit and don my invisible “I don’t care what you think about me – I can’t help it if she’s crying and wailing in public” cape – and just do my best to keep her screams to a minimum.

Oh yeah….I knew it all. And then I became a mom and realized – I knew nothing and continue to learn every moment. It’s great, it’s challenging, and it’s the hardest job in the whole world.


  1. AMEN to every single bit of that!!!!! I'm known to dip my child's paci in coke or iced tea to clean it off…oops! ya do what ya gotta do!

  2. Goldens are definitely THE BEST dogs in the world but the amount of hair they leave behind is ridiculous and I only have one. I can only imagine the amount of hair left by two!

  3. Colette and The Chickenwings says:

    Oh, Czarina. Bless you for this little bit of validation for all the mother's out there!! It is funny how much your eyes open when you become a parent…not to mention that you have whole new perspective on your own parents and what they did for you! It's the best!