The "G" word

I was talking to my sister who lives in Lubbock the other day. We talk at least 3-4 days a week if not everyday. We compare weights since we’re both dieting, catch up on how the kiddos are doing, laught and chat etc, etc. But the other day she sounded different – tired and weary.

I asked her if she was ok and how her diet was going. She said she was worn out and that her diet was going poorly. Knowing her – it meant something was stressing her out. She said she had volunteered to run the fundraiser for my niece and nephew’s school for the P.T.A. Now – my niece and nephew go to a private school where many of the families are wealthy – like own oil fields, have 4 houses, have live in nannies – that kind of weatlth. And many of the mothers are fortunate to stay at home with their kids. My sister and her husband work both work very hard to be able to keep their kids in private school.

I asked her why she volunteered since it’s such a huge undertaking considering she’s already a Den Mom for Boy Scout’s and works full time and that lots of the other mother’s who stay at home normally volunteer for that kind of thing.

She said she felt guilty.

Ah yes – the “G” word….

She had a case of working mother’s guilt. The guilt of working moms that stems from the fact that they aren’t with their kids during the day, aren’t able to make it to all of their kid’s events because of work, and only get a few hours a night with their kids because they have a job. She said she feels like she has to do to this – so that she can contribute to their education since she can’t do a lot of things during the day.
Now – if you know my sister and her husband – they are absolutely devoted to my niece and nephew. They make it a point to schedule days off and work around their lunch schedule to try and attend all the things that Garrett and Maddie have going on.

I listened to her and felt a tug at my heart. I then brought up “stay at home mom’s guilt.” My guilt stems from the fact that I’m not contributing to the household income. I feel guilty when Craig walks in the door and the house isn’t picked up, dinner isn’t ready and we have a cranky baby. I feel guilty when I run to the mall and get my hair done or buy a few clothes because technically – I didn’t earn the money that I’m getting ready to spend. When time and time again Craig said my contribution to our household is just- if not more- important than his – he may provide financially but I’m caring for our little one.

G.U.I.L.T.

It plagues mothers – working or staying at home. I hate that we (we – being women – specifically moms) – feel like we have to rule both worlds. I know that working or not – mother’s are doing their best to provide for their kids no matter what they are doing – either contributing to the finances or choosing to be at home.

Both – sacrificial no matter how you look at it. Working mom’s are still mom’s and quite frankly – stay at home moms – what we do is work too!

I tip my hat to all the mother’s out there – no matter what you’re doing – you’re doing a phenomenal job!

On a lighter note…look how cute my Izzy is!

Comments

  1. Ashley Coleman says:

    That is why I feel so blessed to have the best of both worlds. I still get to contribute to the income and help my husband but I also get some really good quality time with Owen.

    Love the pic! Today is Owen's 8 week shots. UGH